Reading Arianna Huffington’s book On Becoming Fearless, I was struck by the first paragraph on fearless parenting:

“There is no love more intense than the love we have for our children. And whenever you find intense love, you are sure to find intense fear lurking just beneath the surface.”

No disputing the truth of this. But it’s not just about parenting. It holds for all our loving relationships and none more so than the relationship we have with ourselves. Especially when it comes to our cherished life purpose.

“What is your life purpose?”

“I dunno”

As I struggled to find the answer to my life purpose years ago, my coach told me that the closer we get to our life purpose the more resistance we’ll feel. Get close to what you really love and fear will block you from seeing it. Are you searching for your life purpose and are completely blank? It’s a sure sign that you are right on top of it!

Strange, eh? Wouldn’t we want to find what will make us feel most alive?

We resist our life purpose because we love it so much. Because it will change us and change our relationships with others. And we do not know what these changes might bring.

Marianne Williamson addresses this beautifully:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us…”

If you are running up against resistance in the quest for your life purpose, let go and relax a little. Often I ask my coaching clients to imagine themselves years in the future. Having a conversation with your future self can reveal a sense of the next steps to take. Don’t force it. Be gentle. It’s like one of those hidden pictures that were so popular in the 1980’s. The picture appears to be an abstract pattern until you soften your focus and the image reveals itself.

How to Open Yourself to Your Life’s Purpose, an article on Oprah.com, lists wisdom that includes “Dwell in Possibilities,” and “Tune Out the Voice of the World.” (See my blog post on Why Listening to Other People is a Big Mistake.) Oprah’s important 10^th step is “Be Patient.” Know that may take some time for your purpose to reveal itself, and consider you learn in this time of patience.

While you are waiting, you may want to think about the rest of Marianne Williamson’s words:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Enjoy!